birthday – noteworthy

Core values are a set of principles that people and organizations seek to emulate when they are living their day-to-day life. The goal is to see these values in whatever the person or organization does. When I was deciding to expand Notes by Alex from a personal blog to something larger, I thought long and hard about what I wanted the core values to be. I thought about what I valued and what was a message that needed to be spread. I landed on unity, hospitality, and love as our three core values. They were simple, easy-to-remember, and generally universal. These are values that I want to see more of in the world. I want to help people spread these in the world. One AMAZING way to show hospitality and love to others is with OPEN WHEN letters. My challenge to you is to make a set of Open When letters this month!

what is an open when letter?

An open when letter is specialized notes that you make for a loved one (partner, spouse, family member, friend, mentor, etc.). You decide on certain conditions or criteria which allows a person to open that specific letter. That letter has a one-of-a-kind note, written by you to encourage your loved one. These conditions can be positive conditions (open when you get a promotion), negative conditions (open when you feel lonely), or anything in between (open when its Wednesday). The purpose of this is to encourage, love, and uplift those whom you love.

It is a great gift for anyone. And it does not cost much. But just because it is cheap financially does not mean it is a cheap gift. You are spending a lot of time to deliver something personal and edifying to you loved one. It is worth quite a lot to the person who will receive it. This is a perfect gift for any occasion. It can be a great birthday gift for a surprise party. This would be great for someone who is going through a hard time. Maybe, your relationship or friendship is about to long distance, and you want to be able to encourage even from the distance. This could be an anniversary gift! Or perhaps, there is no reason at all other than you want to show some love. Whatever the reason, get started now!

how do I make open when letters?

You only need a few basic things. The most basic thing is that you will need paper, cards, or cardstock. You will need something to write the messages on, obviously. I do believe in handwriting these because it makes it super personal (unless you have unreadable handwriting). Then, you will also need some envelopes to put the letters in. Lastly, you will need pens and things to decorate your open when letters.

The last time that I made open when letters. It was a quick spur of the moment decision. I took about two hours to make and deliver them, but I did not really have any envelopes at the time. So what I did was that I made the printer paper that I wrote on the envelope. I folded the paper in such a way that it looked like an envelope, and when he would open one, it would unfold to be the message. Check out this video to learn how to fold paper into an envelope.

what are the rules of open when letters?

for you, the writer

Have a variety of conditions for them to open when
Draft out all of your letters before making the final versions
Decide if you want to include more than just the letters
- For example, if you did a letter for open when you miss me, you could include pictures of your favorite memories together or something that would remind him/her of you.
Don’t look up what to write in each letter. Make the letters personal! Write from your heart because you are writing these as you to your loved one. You will know the words to say!
Enjoy the process. You are doing this to spread love to your friend/family/mentor/mentee/significant other. Knowing that should fill you with a sort of joy. It will not turn out well if you are feeling dread while working on this project.

for the recipient

No peeking!
Open the letters whenever they apply
Only open up to 2 letters a week, so that they last longer
DON’T LOSE THE LETTERS
(If you want, you can also add a rule that he/she lets you know when he/she opens one.)

ideas for open when conditions

I figured that you needed a starting place for generating ideas for what conditions you should include. Here is your list to get you on track! Open when…

OPEN FIRST (I think you should have one to explain what it is and the rules to the recipient)
You feel lonely
It’s the BEST DAY EVER
Friday
You need a laugh
It finally feels like spring!
Your faith is wavering
You are hungry
It’s Christmas
You’ve lost something important
You need to rant
Nightmare!
We haven’t talked in a while
It is Thanksgiving!
You can’t sleep
You’re sad
Boredom Strikes
Today is your birthday
Inspiration is needed!
You are having a rough day
You’re filled with guilt
Exciting News!
The feeling of nostalgia is welling up inside
There’s finally snow outside!
You hear “our song”
It feels impossible to sleep
OPEN LAST

final thoughts

Open when letters are always a good idea in my mind. They are amazing ways to show others love and hospitality (which in turn leads to greater unity). It is not only good for the recipient, but it also has value for the writer. You learn to appreciate you loved one as you recall the things that makes him/her special and special to you. Find ways to make your open when letters truly special.

Maybe you can make one of their favorite recipes to put with the letters.
Make this a group project for a friend who needs a little extra love. Either have different people write different topics, OR have everyone write something for each condition so that there is a little extra love spread. Your loved one’s day can be brightened when reading a bunch of letters from people who love him/her.
Make a giant event where people pick 3 topics or so to write open when letters for. Everyone writes the letters, and then, they give personalized ones to everyone, so that everyone has a complete set.

These are just some ideas that I came up with. Put in the comments some ideas that you may have in order to level-up open when letters. Growing in unity while affirming others with hospitality and love!

Until next time,

“My loved one has a birthday coming up! I want to throw him/her a birthday party!” No worries, we’ve got you covered. Throwing a surprise birthday party seems like a lot of work to plan for, but in reality, they are easier than you would expect. This guide will lead you through step-by-step for how to plan and host an iconic surprise party that your loved one will appreciate.

plan the surprise party

So you have decided to plan a surprise party for a loved one? Well, this is your guide to have the greatest party of all time. The first step is to get some of the major details decided.

Decide the date.
How many guests do you want?
Who is going to help you?
Will there be a theme?
Decorations?

assemble your team

To throw a truly successful surprise birthday party, you will need to form a team. You cannot do it all alone. Find 2 or 3 trusted friends who you plan on inviting in order to help you make your party a success. Have people who know the person well help out. They can be helpful in a variety of ways. Delegate tasks so that the entire burden is not on you.

Food and Drink Coordinator – This person will organize all of the refreshments for the event. This person does not have to prepare or buy all of the food by himself or herself. But, it is good to decide what is needed and how to set it up. Whether the food is being homemade, bought, or delivered, there needs to be a point person to set it up.
Surprise Decoy – The point of a surprise party is the surprise, but you will need someone to help you get the guest of honor to the venue without arousing suspicion. This person can also help you buy time if things are going awry. Ultimately, this person’s job is just to spend time with your friend until it is time to arrive to the party.
Gift Guide – If you all are getting a gift together, have someone coordinate it. Have someone to be the point person to collect all of the donations in order to purchase the gift.

send out the surprise party invites

This may seem like it is the most obvious part, but you will need to send out your invitations. Decide who you want at the party. Find people who mean a lot to your guest of honor. Family, friends, mentors, roommates, and close coworkers are some of the best people to invite. If they are unable to come, try to find a way to include them still somehow. I’m sure they would love to be included even if they cannot be present.

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decor galore

Decoration is something that is often overlooked, but nonetheless, it is something that sets the scene for an overall experience. Decoration does not have to be anything extravagant. I have a whiteboard in my living room which I can decorate to fit whatever the theme is. I also have a message board where I typically include the title of the event that I am hosting. There is a lot that you can do for decoration that is typically cheap…

Colorful Napkins, Plates, and Cutlery that go with the theme
Making a movie poster for the guest of honor on Canva
Designs cut out of colored paper
Small Battery-operated tea candles

These are just ideas to get you started, and doing all three of the ideas above would cost less than $10 to implement. Decoration does not have to an ice sculpture with various moving parts, but small tasteful decorations will make all the difference in a surprise party. (Plus, it saves you from a lot of cleanup.)

favorite foods

For the last surprise party that I hosted, I included some of his favorite foods. He is a lover of pizza, coffee, and (interestingly) strawberries. The pizza and coffee were easy, but I knew that I definitely wanted to incorporate strawberries somehow. Like most people, he loves chocolate. Chocolate-covered strawberries were the obvious option. I got white chocolate and dark chocolate to cover the strawberries. Then, I decorated them further with gold drizzle and luster dust.

Figure out what your guest of honor loves. When you figure it out, your menu has already been made. Be clever on how you get the information though. As with everything, you do not want them to catch on. Let it be a natural part of the conversation. My best friend had polls on his Instagram where you could ask him questions. I would always bombard him with questions. Included in those questions were things that I wanted to know for his party, such as what he wanted and foods he liked. Because I was already asking a lot of questions, he was none the wiser. I already knew a lot of what he liked, but this got me more ideas.

Figure out what works for you. If you can, ask someone who knows the person well. They can give you the inside scoop without compromising your secrecy.

surprise! and special touches

It’s the day of the surprise, and you are getting everything together. The food is ready to be served. All decorations are set up. You know who to expect and when to expect them. Everyone on their team is doing their job, especially the surprise decoy who has arguably the most important job. Now, it is just time for any last finishing touches before the party.

In my blog post on hosting an unforgettable game night, I mentioned having an interactive element for guests when they arrive. This still holds true for surprise parties. For the last surprise party that I hosted, I made a guest book of sorts. When guests arrived, they would write their favorite memory and an encouraging note to the birthday boy. Because I had thought of this days in advanced, I also reached out to people who I did not invite or who could not make it to also write messages which I would simply type up. This “guest book” was one of his favorite parts, and all it took was a few sheets of paper (with a graphic I made).

With all of that finished, it is time for the surprise! Inform your decoy of when to arrive, and prepare for the surprise. Everyone needs to get into position, and when the time is right and they enter, surprise your guest of honor. Enjoy yourselves as a lot of hard work went into planning this successful surprise party!

What is something unique that you have included or want to include in your surprise parties? Let me know in the comments!